You all know of whom I speak. Ezekiel Elliott of the Dallas Cowboys has signed the deal of all running back deals, a six-year extension worth $90M. That’s a lot of cereal to put in the imaginary first down bowl. The deal marks the end of a hold out that lasted all offseason, and a seemingly sweet vacation to Cabo San Lucas with Marshall Faulk where Zeke had been training. I personally believe there was never a chance he missed the first game, and I also believe both sides knew that was the case (see my AB blog). They just didn’t find it necessary to leak the real narrative, and NFL twitter started to sweat. There are a lot of folks who must be thrilled that Zeke has returned to Jerry world. I do not, however, think Mr. Jones is at the top of this list. Before Dallas fans blow up my comments section and send this link to all of their friends and everyone reads it and clicks and more views and sponsorships because I can prove incredible web traffic (hate to see it), I think Jones realizes he has to have this awkward conversation one more time in the near future. Let me tell ya, I don’t think Dak Prescott has the same kind of pull. Jared Goff>>>>> Let me consult the stats department and get back to you on that.
Dallas fans are happy. I would have added “obviously” in the last sentence, but it’s 2019 and I am not going to assume anything about anyone. I personally know two Dallas fans. They are happy people, though I think it relates to overall life and stuff. The phrase “Dallas fans are happy” plays.
Saquon Barkley, Alvin Kamara and Christian McCaffrey have to be on another planet right now. They are coming up on paydays themselves, and while they might not get the new record-breaking bankroll, the bar is set incredibly high. I am a big Run CMC fan. I also have Venmo. My influence can be bought.
The last person I care to mention on this list is…me. That’s right! I’m the sucker who drafted Zeke in the first round of fantasy football, and I can sleep easy tonight knowing he’s back. I didn’t have a choice! I had the third pick; Saquon went 1 and CMC 2. Kamara was another guy’s keeper (and this guy got away with murder – he had to give up something dumb like a 7th round pick). I kept JuJu and gave up a 5th round draft choice, and didn’t want to stack my team with receivers so early. I believe in elite running backs in fantasy. I stuck my neck wayyyy out there. The respectable Mr. Elliott was, is and will be looking out for me, and he was on the next flight to Dallas. Winner winner, no ice bath for me next year dinner!
Week 1 - TNF
Let’s get tomorrow’s game. I need the workday to absolutely fly by so we can get to some smash mouth football. We have Green Bay vs. Chicago, which is an amazing way to start the season. I think Trubisky is in for a fantastic year, especially if all his weapons stay healthy (looking at you Trey Burton). The Bears D is going to be an absolute force. I think the Bears are in for a strong season. On the other side of the ball, I’m really not sure what to expect out of Green Bay this year. I do know one thing – don’t ever count Rodgers out. He’ll find a way to mix things up and make it interesting tomorrow night. My pick for the game – the Bears dominate the game, not a ton of points, and the score suggests it was kinda close. I hate late touchdowns as a result of prevent defense. Green Bay 16 – Chicago 20. Congrats on a great opening win to my good friend, Big Cat.
On a very serious note, Hurricane Dorian is causing serious problems for the people of the Bahamas and Florida, and will soon be impacting Georgia and the Carolinas. If you are in the path of the storm, please be safe. Locate fresh drinking water, non-perishable food sources, flashlights and batteries, and please keep an eye on pets and elderly neighbors. If you have the means to help out another, whether by donation, clean up efforts, or simply prayers, please do so. Be safe! Stay Crispy, friends.